Falling vs. Building

Even in the days when I thought most boys were gross, I still wanted to fall in love. Between Prince Eric of The Little Mermaid to Randy on Home Improvement and Zach on Saved by the Bell, I knew my Prince Charming had to be out there somewhere. I remember dreaming of the day when I would meet him. Naturally, he would sweep me off my feet, and we would instantly fall in love. In he would come riding on a white horse, save the day (and me, of course), and we would live happily ever after. Yep. I couldn't wait to fall in love.

Then, I started thinking about everything that I assocoated with falling.

1) Descending to a lower place (what happens when you trip over that pile of clothes in your bedroom...)

2) Pain (...and what you experience if your knee lands on something sharp in the middle of the pile)

3) Losing control/balance (Hey, nobody said walking in heels was easy!)

4) Lack of support (Have you seen how SKINNY stilettos are?!)

5) To be overthrown (like a city under attack)

6) Losing animation in expression (You know...when your smile disappears if you get bad news)

7) Embarassment (Especially if you've ever fallen UP the stairs - it takes talent.)

8) Disagreeing to the point of ending a relationship (Ever had a "falling out" with your so-called BFF?)

9) To come to nothing (like when your plans fall through)

10) Something that is deficient or lacking (Falling short of what is expected of you)

Do you still want to FALL in love? I know I don't. None of those things sound like much fun to me. How could falling in love be any different?

I know, I know. I'm married. Obviously, you are thinking I fell in love with James.

But I didn't.

Don't get me wrong. I am deeply in love with my husband. I am so excited to share my life with him and experience the romance that God intended for us to have.

Think about it though. Let's look what Jesus has to teach us about falling. Matthew 7:24-27 says, “Therefore whoever hears these sayings of Mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on the rock; and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock. But everyone who hears these sayings of Mine, and does not do them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it fell. And great was its fall.”

I remember the first time I ever heard this parable that Jesus taught of the wise man who built his house upon a rock and the foolish man who built his house on the sand. In all of my six-year-old wisdom, I came home from church and told my mom that we studied The Three Little Pigs in Sunday School...but the preacher must have gone too long in big church because my teacher had to leave out one of the pigs. Cute, right? :)

Imagine the foolish man's house. I can just picture this dingy surfer dude getting the bright idea that He could construct his crib on the sand - loose fine pieces of rock that are unstable, change with the tide, and can be blown away with a light breeze. Bright idea, dude. Not your gnarliest plan.

But don't we do the same thing if we FALL in love? Is that relationship built on things that are unstable, like how AMAZING their blue eyes (or tinted contacts) are? Or things that can change, like emotion? (You know you've heard the excuse, "The magic's just not there anymore.") If a relationship is not build on a firm foundation, commitment can be shifted as easily as sand.

Enter Prince Charming. He's got it all together - he's prepared, complete with a plan AND a purpose. It is not an uption for his house (aka, the relationship in our case) to fall. He's a builder.

Think for a minute about the thoughts you associate with building...

1) To join parts to create something better (i.e. turning buttons and material into a new jacket!)

2) To establish or strengthen (like building a business)

3) To base or found (such as building a relationship on trust)

4) To increase in intensity (Like how Kelly Clarkson songs always builds on the bridge leading into the last chorus)

5) To praise or compliment (For instance, when your best friend builds you up to give you the courage to go talk to that really hot guy in your English class)

What that means for the wise man is that he is buiding something that is stronger and better than before. In a storm with heavy floods and harsh winds, his house remains secure. Sounds like Prince Charming has the potential to be Mr. Right, while our gnarly surfer dude has missed his chance of even being Mr. Right NOW.