Noah's Wife

You've heard the story in Sunday School a dozen times. In case you haven't, I can catch you up to speed pretty quickly. Turning to Genesis 6, we can see that God has gotten pretty frustrated with the people of the world because of their wicked ways. He decided to send a flood that would destroy the world. He decided to save a godly man, Noah, and his family, to re-populate the earth. So God told Noah to build an ark (a big boat) because it would rain for 40 days and 40 nights and everything that was not in the ark would be destroyed. At this point, it would be wise to note that it had never rained before. But Noah was faithful and spent the next years of his life constructing the ark exactly as God instructed. When the time came for the flood, Noah, his family, and two of every living creature got inside the ark and were saved from the rain. This was not your ordinary thunderstorm. It rained 40 days and 40 nights, but the earth remained flooded for 150 days, and they had to wait even LONGER for the water to drain and evaporate. Then, God promised never to destroy the earth again and marked his promise with the seal of the rainbow.
Sound familiar? Now, tell me what you know about Noah's wife. Done already? Thought so. She is mentioned 5 times in the story, but she is only identified as Noah's wife. However, I think there are many things that we can learn from her.
She was SPIRITUALLY strong. If she had been a wicked woman, God would have had her destroyed in the flood too! In the covenant that God made with Noah, (Genesis 9:1) God instructed Noah and his wife, as well as Noah's three sons and their wives, to "be fruitful and multiply." He wanted them to have children because God trusted that Noah and his wife would be godly examples and raise their children to serve Him. Think about that for a minute. If God wanted to start over with an entire human race, would He consider you worthy of raising the next generation? She had to have been pretty special.

She was a PHYSICALLY strong. We're not ever told in the Bible how old she was, but we have to assume that she was somewhere near Noah's age. We know that Noah was 500 when they had their three sons. Okay...in today's world of advanced technology and medical experts, women who become pregnant over the age of 30 are considered high risk. So giving birth at 500, she had to have been ULTRA high risk! But she was obviously strong enough to handle it. Plus, let's think about the time spent on the ark - she had her husband, three sons, and their wives to care for. Not to mention, she had to care for two of every living creature. This was NOT a Carnival Cruise ship. I'm sure the smell on the boat was less than pleasant, labor was hard, and seasickness was inevitable...but she did it.

She was EMOTIONALLY strong. Going back to Noah's age, we know he was 500 when they had their three sons (Genesis 5:32), and he was 600 when he and his family got into the ark (Genesis 7:11). We don't know exactly how much time passed between these two verses in Scripture, but it is completely possible that it took Noah and his sons that one hundred years to construct a boat that would be big enough for their entire family as well as the animals. That's a major commitment, and it probably meant that she didn't get to spend much time with her husband. I know that if James is working a lot, whether it be his job or school, and I need some attention, I have NO PROBLEM letting him know it! He gets to hear, "James! Pay attention to me!" (Subtle, I know.) But there's no record in the Bible that she ever uttered the first complaint.

She was MENTALLY strong. Let's get real here. However long the ark-building process lasted, she probably lost any friend she ever had. Let's say that you live in Death Valley, California. (This is the place that holds the record for the hottest temperature ever recorded.) Your friend cames up to you at church and says, "God told my husband to build an igloo because it's going to snow for 40 days and 40 nights, and it's the only way we will survive." Would you think she was crazy? Chances are, you would set your cell phone to go off with an alert ring if Caller ID showed it was her number, "forget" to invite her to things, and avoid her at all costs. This is the same reaction that Noah's wife probably got from her friends. They had never seen rain, and they didn't even know what it was. I'm sure she felt pretty alone during that time, but she trusted that God was in control.
She decided to be Noah's partner in the adventure. She could have left Noah. She could have listened to her friends who said that he was crazy and started her life over on her own. Her life could have been pretty normal for those one hundred years that Noah spent building the boat instead of the hard times that she endured alone. However, she would have seriously regretted not following God's plan when the rain started and she was destroyed with the rest of the human race. Decide right now to follow God's voice, no matter how insane His plan sounds. I've heard it said that we can only live life forward, but we can only understand life backward. Trust the One who can see the backward part of it already.

And this last one may not apply to you now...but it will someday. Never resent the time that your boyfriend/husband spends serving the Lord. James and I are extremely busy, so the little time that we have together is precious. We are both in school. He is over two ministries at our church - double the phone calls, double the emails, double the meetings...you get the picture. James may have to prepare a lesson for Sunday morning, or he may have to let an overnight group in to stay in our facilities at midnight. From the example of Noah's wife, we can learn that our significant others just might be a modern-day Noah - a GIANT of the Christian faith. There is no such thing as being overzealous for God. Count your blessings for a godly man when he chooses to submit himself wholly to God,

Lessons from an Unknown Servant Girl

It's a normal day, and you are at your house with your family. You and your sister are helping your mom with dinner while your dad and brothers work in the yard. Your country is at war, so supplies are tight, but your family does as much as possible to keep things positive. In the midst of cooking, two soldiers kick down your front door. You scream as they grab you. You reach for your mother, but it's too late. One of the soldiers already has you in his arms and out the door. You cry as you watch your home get smaller with distance, and you are taken away from your family. You are now a servant girl to a leader from your country's enemy... Weeks after you are taken, you discover that your master has a deadly disease. How would you react?

Well, I'm going to be really honest. If you're me, my first reaction is, "Serves you right! Take me away from my family, and see what happens to you!! Hope it hurts!" Yeah, I know... that's not the reaction you would expect from a Christian young woman. I hope that if I was genuinely put in that situation that I would behave like the girl that this very thing actually happened to did. (But that would be my first reaction. I would just have to pray really hard for the Holy Spirit to take over!)

This whole story is recorded in II Kings 5:1-19. I'll tell you the condensed version. Like many of the other amazing women in the Bible, we don't know this young girl's name, but there are several things we do know. She was an young Israelite and was taken captive by the Syrians. She was ordered to be a servant girl to a man named Naaman. We are unsure if she was actually captured by him or if she was purchased for his household in a slave market. Either way is possible.

Her actual job was to serve Naaman's wife, so she probably performed household chores, like cooking meals and cleaning, as well as bathing and dressing her mistress. From what we know about Naaman, he seemed like a decent enough guy. He was known as a great man and a brave warrior in his nation, and he was respected by his king. Then, he was struck with leprosy (a really gross contagious disease that can doesn't always go away, causes alterations in your skin and nerves, along with muscle weakness, deformities, and paralysis.) Yuck!

So here's where the amazing part comes in. This servant girl remembered in Israel that there was a prophet who healed men of leprosy in the name of God. II Kings 5:3 says, "She said to her mistress, "If only my master would see the prophet who is in Samaria! He would cure him of his leprosy." To cut a long story short (only if you promise to check out the whole thing on your own...it's an awesome story!), Naaman did go to the prophet, and he was healed of his leprosy. Not only that, but II Kings 5:15, Naaman even declares faith in God! He said, "Now I know that there is no God in all the world except in Israel." All because a young girl spoke up! We can learn a lot from her.

She was compassionate. She was felt sorry that her master had leprosy and wanted him to be healed. Where she certainly had every reason to hate this man, she desires for him to be cured from his sickness. Instead of being consumed in her own heartache of being ripped from her family, she was concerned for someone else. When was the last time that you genuinely thought of someone else before looking out for yourself? This servant girl had nothing to gain from helping her master. It's not like she would be released back to her family if she gave him this information. But this man who had taken her away from her family mattered to her because she knew that Naaman mattered to God.

She was trustworthy. The mistress related what the girl had said to her husband, then "Naaman went to his master and told him what the girl from Israel had said.” (II Kings 5:4) You want to know the best way to be trustworthy to people? Be real. Be genuine. Be YOURSELF. People can spot fakeness from a mile away.

She had serious faith. Even though she was in a difficult circumstance herself, she still believed that God was going to take care of her. She also believed in the power of the prophet of God - that God could empower him to heal her master. As a servant, if she had wasted her master's time and money to go to a prophet who did not help him, her life could have been in danger. But she never doubted that God could and would heal Naaman.

Her boldness led to Naaman's salvation. Instead of being bitter about her circumstance, she was a blessing to Naaman and his family by offering him a way out of a deadly disease. After seeing a miracle of God, Naaman submitted himself to the Lord and is in heaven today because she had the courage to speak up! Being brave can be hard...but wouldn't it be worth it if someone came up to you in heaven and told you that they were there because YOU chose to be bold?

She took the opportunity God gave her. We never know when or how God might use us. But we do know that there are plenty of lost people out there who need Jesus. Look past your own circumstance and take every chance you get to share with those you come in contact with that Jesus is the answer to their problem. I tell people all the time, "I can't solve your problem, but I know the one who can."

The B-I-B-L-E

Did anybody read the title of this post and sing out (either out loud or in their head), "Yes, that's the book for me!"

That used to be one of my favorite songs as a kid. You know..."The B-I-B-L-E. Yes, that's the book for me. I'm standing firm on the Word of God. The B-I-B-L-E!"

With childlike innocence, I had no idea that little song could be easily debated in theological circles. I just liked the spelling part.

I'm older now, and I've actually now read the book I just used to sing about. It's so much more than lyrics to a song I learned in Sunday School. It's so much more than a book. It's the Word of God. Knowing Scripture means knowing the King of Kings.

Since this book is my main resource in my relationship with Christ, I've written vows - just like the ones I made to my husband when we got married. I will not take this book lightly. I will realize the permanence of my commitment to God's Word.

2 Timothy 4:3 says, "For a time is coming when people will no longer listen to sound and wholesome teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever their itching ears want to hear." I vow to take responsibility for the presuppositions that I bring to the text, acknowledging that my experience, background, and personal belief system will all effect how I will interpret Scripture. While presuppositions cannot be avoided, I vow to be self-critical enough to recognize that my own personal theories may not be accurate and dedicated enough to read Scripture as objectively as possible, remembering the warnings in Scripture of relying too heavily on my own desires rather than what His Word says.

2 Timothy 3:16 says, "All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right." I believe God has provided two main sources of revelation of who He is. He reveals Himself through His written Word in Scripture, and He best reveals Himself through the personal example of His Son, Jesus Christ, whom we come to know through the Word. Therefore, the Bible is irreplaceable as how God reveals Himself to the world.

Psalm 119:160 says, "The very essence of your words is truth; all your just regulations will stand forever." I regard Scripture as my final Word. The Bible is set apart from any other written manuscript because the text results from dual authorship; there is a human author and a divine author. Therefore, Scripture has authority not only as a historical account from an author who was present at the time, but Scripture exists as the holy Word of God. Therefore, I vow to always use Scripture as my ultimate authority.

John 17:17 says, "Make them holy by your truth; teach them your word, which is truth." I commit that His Word is truth. Therefore, I believe that Scripture contains no error, no discrepancy, and no confusion, but it is the complete and absolute truth. It is by learning His Word and putting its teachings into practice that I may become more like Jesus and less like me.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." I believe God has a plan and a purpose for each of His children who are seeking after Him. We seek Him by digging into His Word to learn more about Him. I vow to follow His Word, trusting that His teachings will never lead me astray.

Isaiah 40:8 says, "The grass withers and the flowers fade, but the word of our God stands forever.” Sixth, I hold to the fact that God’s Word is timeless, making it as relevant to me today as it was when it was written thousands of years ago. Scripture can be applied across time and across cultures; it has no boundaries or limitations.

John 10:35 says, "And you know that the Scriptures cannot be altered." I vow to view Scripture in its whole entirely, not just picking and choosing verses I like to gather meaning. I commit to search for the common purpose within His Word to reconcile me to Him and grow spiritually.

I vow to respect His Word and remain in awe of His presence while daily meditating in His Word. I commit to pray for continued passion to hide His Word in my heart that I might not sin against Him. As I seek Him, I submit to Him in total faith to use His Word as a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. (Psalm 119:11; 105)

The Skeleton in My Mirror

Everyone has skeletons in their closet - secret shame from your past that you don't want anyone to find out about. But this is a picture of my skeleton - except I didn't keep mine in my closet. I had to look at mine in the mirror everyday.

It started out as an attempt to become more “healthy.” After watching several older friends take on the “freshman 15” in college, I was determined it wouldn’t happen to me. At 118 pounds, I decided to make some changes.

First, I decided I needed to increase my exercise. In high school, I worked at a health and fitness center, so I typically worked out 4-5 times a week. When I would finish a shift, I would head to the cardio machines and leisurely jog on the treadmill or go to a strength-training class.

That wasn’t enough for me now. I read that it was better to work out on an empty stomach, so I began getting up at 5 a.m. to get my workout in before class. But that didn’t mean that I stopped my routine at night after work. Double the exercise meant double the results.

I started getting attention from the personal trainers and fitness managers. “Michelle, you’re in such great shape. You look amazing. It’s such a waste having you at the front desk. Why don’t you get certified to teach classes?”

Did I just get offered to get paid to workout? Somebody pinch me, because I am dreaming. It was perfect. I paid for the certifications out of my savings account, and before I knew it, I was no longer standing behind a desk. I was up in front of the exercise classes, torching calories for hours a day. Yet, I couldn’t seem to shake the last few pounds that I wanted gone.

“Michelle, you know that working out is only 20% of weight loss. 80% is nutrition,” one of the personal trainers informed me when I shared my frustrations. Enough said. Exercise more, check. Operation: Eat Less would begin.

I began doing intensive research on the healthiest foods, the lowest in calories, and the lowest in fat grams. I developed my “Safe Foods” and made sure they were always accessible. I knew as long as I stuck to my routine, I knew exactly what was going into my body. There wouldn’t be a single calorie unaccounted for.

Operation: Eat Less included old fashioned oats and ½ cup of egg whites for breakfast. I ate a turkey sandwich on whole grain bread with lettuce and mustard only. If I had already worked out that day, I could have an apple for dessert. For a snack, I would have non-fat yogurt and carrot sticks. My dinner consisted of a chicken breast, steamed broccoli, and a sweet potato (if I hadn’t eaten the apple at lunch. Before I went to bed, I drank 8 oz. of skim milk. Oh, and I had 128 oz. of water each day. It always came out to less than 800 calories a day. (I wrote it down in my food diary each day.) I burned twice as many calories as I consumed most days. Sometimes I burned even more.
The weight fell off of me. I’m not sure how quickly it happened or when exactly it all came of. I still felt disgustingly fat each time I looked in the mirror. How was it possible that I still looked heavy in the mirror when size 0 pants had to be taken in to fit me?

I no longer saw benefits from two-a-day workouts. I wasn’t sure I could force myself to eat less. I was already starving. I asked my manager for more classes. Pretty soon, I was teaching 15 classes a week.

By this point, the compliments had stopped. They were replaced with, “Michelle, you’re so thin. Maybe you should back off a few days. Are you sure you’re eating enough?”

Instead of paying attention to their concerns, they only motivated me more. But the comments didn’t stop. I knew I was going to have to do something to prove to everyone that I didn’t have a problem – because I didn’t. I just wanted to be healthy.

I needed a mask, and I needed one fast. I entered a pageant. What person with an eating disorder or an unhealthy body image would purposely parade around on a stage in a swimsuit? It was perfect.

I was 19. I didn’t think I stood a chance. But at the end of the night, the crown went on my head – average, good student, little church nerd ME! That’s when the mixed signals started. At the same time I heard, “Michelle, I think you might be a little too skinny,” I heard, “But you look absolutely amazing on camera.”

From there, I went from bad to worse. Now, I was going to have to compete against 50 of the most beautiful girls in my state. I knew I couldn’t beat them in age or experience. They had a few years of maturity on me in the talent competition. But I could do everything in my power to rock the swimsuit competition. I just had to have the will power. If I couldn’t get rid of the weight while I was still eating, I would just stop eating altogether.

I cut out snacks first, then meals. Before long, I was skipping entire days of eating. All while keeping up my exercise class teaching schedule. Plus, I decided I needed to train for a half-marathon.

It was empowering. I knew I had something inside of me that was better than everyone else. Everyone I knew had to count on food to survive. I was super-human, I could make it without it. Sure, I would have to break down and eat something every once in a while. I just made sure it was a “negative calorie food” – foods that actually burn more calories to digest that you do from eating them. As if that wasn’t enough, I began taking multiple appetite suppressants and fat burners.

By the time the state pageant rolled around, I was at my smallest. During the swimsuit competition, my dad, who was typically my biggest fan, put the binoculars down. “I can’t look at her like that,” he told my sister. He knew I had a problem. They all did. But anytime they brought it up to me, I had an amazing excuse. I still didn’t think it was a big deal.
Backstage, the girls all fussed over how thin I was – how it was “unfair” to have to walk on stage after me. I looked in the mirror, glancing at my trouble spots, wishing my tummy would be just a little smaller.

“I bet you don’t even weigh 90 pounds,” one of the other contestants challenged.

“Sure, I do,” I said. “I weigh 102,” I said, even though the last time I had stepped on a scale was nearly six months earlier.

“Prove it,” she dared, pointing to a scale in the corner.

“I will,” I replied defiantly, swallowing hard. You would have thought I was walking to the gallows to be hung the way I was dreading stepping on that scale. What if I had gained weight? What if they actually thought I was fat?

Taking a deep breath, I stepped on the scale, closing my eyes.

The other contestant shouted, “Ha ha! I was right! 89 pounds everyone!”

I don’t remember if I said anything to her. I just know her words kept echoing in my brain. 89 pounds. Plus, my shoes and my earrings alone weighed at least five pounds. I know 89 pounds is skinny. Maybe even too skinny. So why do I still feel fat?

All of the sudden, I knew I had a problem.

But I had gotten myself into a mess I didn’t know how to get out of. I didn’t want to disappoint my parents. I didn’t want to have to go through therapy. I didn’t want to have to leave my job or put college on hold. More than that though – I didn’t want to eat. I couldn’t bear the thought of gaining weight.

I knew there was only one way to handle this. Quit fighting, and let food and the mirror win. Just accept that I was afraid of food, and do whatever it took to cover my tracks. There were times I would go to bed hoping I wouldn’t wake up so it would be over. I had trouble sleeping. Many nights, I heard my parents and my older sister come into my room to check to make sure I was breathing.

My family did everything they could. I left the house before they were awake most mornings. I would leave the pantry door partially open so they would think I had gotten breakfast before I left. They would bring my dinner at work. I would make up an excuse about having to train a client, but I was always appreciative. I shudder to think about how much money they spent on food that I put in the trash can or gave away. I knew I was hurting them. I heard my mom’s sniffles. I saw the circles under my dad’s eyes. I felt my sister pulling away from me like she knew she had to distance herself since they were losing me.
A small detail I forgot to mention: I was still a leader in my church throughout all of this. I taught a bible study to the youth group girls. I sang in the praise team every Sunday morning and Sunday night. Yet I had completely abandoned my personal relationship with Christ. I knew the Sunday school answers. I knew the public prayers to pray. But I couldn’t force myself to be real with God because I couldn’t bring myself to think about how much I was hurting Him.

But as God tends to do, He eventually got my attention. On April 14, 2005, I took off to a park about 10 minutes away from my parent’s house to complete my last long run before my upcoming marathon. 20 miles was on the training plan, and it didn’t matter that I hadn’t had a meal in 13 days. I was super human, remember?

I made sure to cover all of my bases beforehand. I knew my parents would call to find out where I was and beg me to come home, so I purposely left my cell phone in the kitchen so they would have no way to reach me.

I made it to mile 19. My vision began to get blurry as I rounded a corner of the familiar park. This stretch of the trail was completely hidden from the road. Trying to clear my vision, I closed my eyes for a few paces. The next thing I knew, I tripped, and I was on the ground. All 84 pounds of me hit the pavement, and I literally felt every brittle bone in my body crack.

Frantically, I scanned for help, but I was all alone. I wanted to cry, but I didn’t have the energy. I couldn’t see anymore, so I tried to open my eyes. Oh my gosh. My eyes felt open, but I couldn’t see anything. What is going on? I knew I should panic. Wait a second. Michelle, why is breathing so hard? Michelle, GET UP! Can you hear me? Why aren’t you moving? This is serious! MICHELLE!

I don’t know how long I laid there and tried to move. I just knew I couldn’t get up. Wow, I thought. So this is it. It finally happened. I am going to die right here on this track. Still trying to move, I attempted to gather my final thoughts. Michelle, how did you let it get this far? How could you be so selfish? Mom will never recover. Dad will never forgive himself. And your sister is getting married in three months and her maid of honor won’t be there.

I knew that I should talk to God. I used to turn to Him for everything, and now, I didn’t know what to say. Still trying to move, I attempted to gather my final thoughts. Michelle, how did you let it get this far? How could you be so selfish? Mom will never recover. Dad will never forgive himself. And Melody’s getting married in three months. Her maid of honor won’t be there, thanks to you! What will they think when they find you like this? What if they don’t find you? What if it’s some child headed to the playground?

Bingo, I thought. Something I can ask God for.

So, for the first time in over a year, I prayed – really prayed. Not a prayer out loud at church to make everyone think that I was the perfect Christian – I was the master of those - but I went before my Savior with a genuine request.

God, I’m not asking You to live. I don’t deserve to live. I know that. But if You could, can I just get up and walk to my car? That’s all I want, Jesus. Just let me walk to my car.

To this day, I don’t know if angels picked me up or if God simply gave me the strength I needed to stand. But through His grace, I stood up. I don’t remember much about the walk to my car, but I know I made it there. I sat in the driver’s seat and reached for the middle console where I usually kept my cell phone. Of course, it wasn’t there. It was on the kitchen counter, where I had accidentally left it on purpose.

Well, there goes your last hope, Michelle. The only thing you can do is sit here and wait to die. I drank some water that I had with me, and I felt it slosh around in my empty stomach.

See, Michelle. You’ve always heard that before you die, you think about what is really important to you. What did you think about? Your family and your faith. Did you think, “Gosh, I am going to look so fat in my casket. I really shouldn’t have eaten that apple almost two weeks ago. You should have ran farther!” NO, YOU DIDN’T!

All of the sudden, I wanted to live. Really live. Not count calories or starve myself. I want to hug my dad and tell my mom I love her, I realized. I want to catch Melody’s bouquet in June. I’m sorry, precious family. God, I want to talk to you, but I don’t know what to say. I turned my car on. Maybe a car running will attract more attention than a parked car.

I don’t remember having my radio on as I was driving to the park. Even f I did, I certainly didn’t have it on the contemporary Christian radio station. Literally and figuratively, I had been running from God for quite some time. People who run from God don’t listen to songs that remind them of their guilt.

Then, I heard it. God’s voice. That comforting voice that I hadn’t heard in so long. Michelle, I love you. In fact, I love you so much, that right now, when you don’t even have the words to say, I’m going to give them to you.

Then, the radio station played the song below:

“Restore Me”
- Anthony Evans

On the outside
You think I'm alright
There's a smile on my face
Everything's okay
But on the inside there's a different story
I've stumbled down this road
And I've got so for the go
I'm a broken man
On my knees again
Longing for a touch from you
I need you hand to

Restore me
I need your mercy
Take me
To the place I used to be
Use all the pain and the hurt
To do a greater work and
Restore me

I wore my mask
Running away from my past
Hiding all my scars
Thinking I'd gone too far
But he knew my pain
And He loved me just the same
He promised I'd be free
If I fell on my knees and cried

Restore me
I need your mercy
Take me
To the place I used to be
Use all the pain and the hurt
To do a greater work and
Restore me

Restore unto me the joy of my salvation
So I'll sing again the song you wrote for me
Give me a clean heart
I want a brand new start
Like the moment when I first believed

Restore me
I need your mercy
Take me
To the place I used to be
Use all the pain and the hurt
To do a greater work and
Restore me
Please, Jesus.
Give me another chance.
I want to be a new man.
Please, Jesus.

With huge tears in my eyes, I felt God’s love surround me. Does this mean you’re going to let me live, Jesus? Suddenly, I had the strength to sit up. I put my car in reverse, and I drove home. Amazed at God’s grace, I came in the door of my house. I immediately saw my mom, and I hugged her.

“Mommy, I need help.”

She nodded, tears streaming down her face. “I know.”

I sat down at the kitchen table, and my dad fixed me something to eat. I don’t remember what I ate, but I know that I didn’t write it down. I didn’t check the nutrition labels before I put it in my mouth.

That doesn’t mean it was over. Recovery was frustrating, especially at first. I remember sitting at a table having to eat a normal meal and crying harder with every bite that I put in my mouth. Each calorie that went into my body was undoing my “hard work and discipline.” I felt like a child again, reintroducing food to my body. My dad even had to give me the Heimlich maneuver on three occasions because I had forgotten how to properly chew and swallow food. I clung to Jeremiah 30:17, “’But I will restore you to health, and heal your wounds,’ declares the Lord.”

Forgiving myself is still a challenge. I can’t believe all of the time I wasted - the opportunities I missed to be an example for the Lord. I can’t believe the hurt my family went through because of my actions. Today, I still deal with the permanent damage I’ve done to my body – something that not only affects me, but my husband as well.

It’s not over – it’s like any stumbling block. Satan know my struggles. He tries to put those thoughts back in my head and to warp the mirror when I look in it. Most of the time, I am able to overcome the temptation “through Christ who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13). On rare occasions, I slip, falling into old patterns of spending too much time at the gym or eating too few calories.

But “the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness” is there every time I fall to pick me up (Exodus 34:6). He values me, He loves me, and I can turn to Him.

Suffering for Jesus

II Timothy 2:1-6 is one of my favorite passages of Scripture. It's also one of the hardest to follow. When I get to heaven, I'm not sure how long it's going to take for me to ask Paul every question that I have for him. From all of the analogies he makes to running, I'm pretty sure that he was a runner. We're going to have to so run a little ultra-marathon on the streets of gold, and that might begin to cover Round 1 of my interview.

When I need to be encouraged, I find myself turning to one of Paul's letters. When I need to be reminded why I'm a Christian, I am drawn to his writings. However, most of the time when I read the text that came from his pen, I end up challenged and humbled. There are many lessons to learn from Paul's words here... let's break it down one piece at a time and see what we find.

"You therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus."

Your strength comes from Christ. So did Paul's. Think about how brave he had to be. How many times was he thrown in prison? How often was he persecuted? Yet, he continued teaching and preaching with boldness. He wasn't a quiet Christian. With courage, he proclaimed the gospel wherever he went. That kind of strength can't be found in our weak flesh. But Paul never boasted about his bravery. Philippians 4:13 says, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." He knew where his strength came from. Do you?

"The things which you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses..."

Make your Christianity contageious. Many people followed Paul...why? I mean, he traveled from town to town, had no home, no shower, no bed...are you following me? He would have been dirty...and probably smelled pretty bad. Why would he have a huge crowd hanging on to his every word? Because people saw something that they didn't have, and they wanted it. Live your life in a way that is different so people will desire to "catch" your relationship with Christ.

"...entrust these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also."

You should be mentoring and teaching others. And no, you are not too young to do so. In Paul's first letter to Timothy, he writes, "Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity; show yourself an example of those who believe." You are never too young to make an impact for Christ. You remember the disciple John - the one that Jesus entrusted his mother to when he was dying on the cross? According to historial records, he was a teenager when he was an apostle. Jesus trusted him enough to ask him to take care of his mother after his death. He might give you a huge responsibility too!

"Suffer hardship with me, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus."

Difficult times come as a package deal with the gift of salvation. Hebrews 12:7 says, "Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?" God uses hard times as teachable moments. I know there were times when my earthly father knew that I was not doing the right thing. Sometimes, he intervened, and at other times, he let me learn the hard way. My daddy learned this approach from God. He uses difficult situations to discipline us, just like a loving parent.

"No soldier in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a soldier."

If you get caught up in the things of this world, you will miss chances to please God. Think about those soldiers that stand outside palaces - the ones that aren't allowed to move. They risk being fired if they blink too much! When they are on duty, they cannot be distracted by anything (even when obnoxious tourists try to do anything they can to make them laugh - not that I would know!) Christians are the same way. We cannot be distracted by the things of this world. We are to concetrate on carrying out the commands given to us by Christ.

"Also if anyone competes as an athlete, he does not win the prize unless he competes according to the rules."

In the Christian life, winning revolves around obedience. God blesses those who obey Him. Also, keep in mind that we will not always be rewarded on this earth. So when you think that you are being obedient and God is not blessing you, be patient. Your eternal reward is waiting for you. This can be hard, especially when it can seem that others around you are disobedient and appear to have everything. But don't give up. When others slip, be obedient. You will never regret it, and you will win in the end.

"The hard-working farmer ought to be the first to receieve his share of the crops."

Often, things don't happen as they "ought" to. Be prepared to take the back seat. I'm the first to admit that I love the spotlight. Who doesn't? Applause. Approval. Acceptance. I don't think anyone could honestly admit that those things don't mean something to them. But it's easy for your acts of service to be overlooked. Sometimes, people get used to them. They may even learn to expect you to go above the beyond - and many times, take you for granted. But do not let yourself be discouraged and cling to the truth in Colossians 3:23-24. "Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve."

Every Fairytale Needs a Rock

Snow White had seven dwarfs. Cinderella had glass slippers (or slipper depending on where you are in the story.) The Little Mermaid even claimed she was "the girl who has everything." But they were all missing the one thing you need for an amazing fairytale romance.

A rock.

Not the answer you were expecting? Hear me out.

You can find the world's biggest rock in Australia. Mount Augustus stands 2,815 feet above the surounding plain, 3,625 feet above sea level and covers 29,794,749 miles. Umm...that's a pretty big rock. Think you could move it? Shake it? Break it? Doubtful. (And if you can, I'm really thankful that there are computer screens between us!)

Imagine the God of the universe as a Rock. Using the information we have about God, His idea of a rock resembles something like Mars. Compared to Him, Mount Augustus is not even a pebble. I wouldn't dream of trying to move that Rock.

But I've tried to do it anyway. When His way didn't quite align up with mine, I've tried to push Him out of my way. I've tried to persuade Him to get what I want, even if I know deep down it's not in His perfect plan...which is as dumb as trying to move Mars.

God should be the foundation - the rock - for your love. A relationship on a foundation of superficial things will crumble. God is the only thing in this life that is unchanging and immovable. A lasting romantic relationship is not between two people, but three: God, Mr. Right, and you.

If you are reading this and married, maybe you need to ask yourself the role God plays in your marriage. If you're single, you have the opportunity to start your love of your future spouse right now by building your love of Christ.

One more thing...there's one more thing about falling in. What's the first thing you would do if you fell in a hole? A ditch? Anything below the ground?

Get out. Of course.

Another great reason not to fall in love. If you don't fall in love, you can't get out of love.

Here are some statistics that might surprise you. The Barna Research group did a study a few years back on divorce, and here is what they found: 11% of the adult population is currently divorced. 25% of adults have had at least one divorce during their lifetime. Between 41-43% of married couples today will eventually get divorced. Surprised yet? If you're not, here is one that I bet will get you...

*Divorce rates among conservative Christians were significently higher ,than for other faith groups, including atheists (people who don't believe God exists)
and agnostics (people who don't think we will ever know in this life if there is a God or not).*

Talk about a wake-up call! People who don't even believe that God exists are less likely to get divorced than God's children. That's why we have to be especially careful in our romantic relationships. Satan attacks wherever He can, and right now, it appears he is calling for war on the Christian family.

Think about it. Read over the statistics again if you need to. If Christians would build solid marriages based on the Lord and stop divorcing, non-believers would stampede the church, demanding to know our secrets. They would demand to meet our God.

One of my favorite professors advised me, "If you are looking for a mate, stop. Run after God as fast as you can. As you're running, continually look to your left and your right to see who's running beside you. When you find someone who is consistently running your pace, grab their hand, and chase after God together. Nothing can break that stride."

Ephesians 2:19-22
"So then you are no longer strangers and alients, but you are fellow citizens with the saints, and are of God's household, having been built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus Himself being the corner stone, in whom the whole building, being fitted together, is growing into a holy temple in the Lord, in whom you are also being built together into a dwelling of God in the Spirit."

Falling vs. Building

Even in the days when I thought most boys were gross, I still wanted to fall in love. Between Prince Eric of The Little Mermaid to Randy on Home Improvement and Zach on Saved by the Bell, I knew my Prince Charming had to be out there somewhere. I remember dreaming of the day when I would meet him. Naturally, he would sweep me off my feet, and we would instantly fall in love. In he would come riding on a white horse, save the day (and me, of course), and we would live happily ever after. Yep. I couldn't wait to fall in love.

Then, I started thinking about everything that I assocoated with falling.

1) Descending to a lower place (what happens when you trip over that pile of clothes in your bedroom...)

2) Pain (...and what you experience if your knee lands on something sharp in the middle of the pile)

3) Losing control/balance (Hey, nobody said walking in heels was easy!)

4) Lack of support (Have you seen how SKINNY stilettos are?!)

5) To be overthrown (like a city under attack)

6) Losing animation in expression (You know...when your smile disappears if you get bad news)

7) Embarassment (Especially if you've ever fallen UP the stairs - it takes talent.)

8) Disagreeing to the point of ending a relationship (Ever had a "falling out" with your so-called BFF?)

9) To come to nothing (like when your plans fall through)

10) Something that is deficient or lacking (Falling short of what is expected of you)

Do you still want to FALL in love? I know I don't. None of those things sound like much fun to me. How could falling in love be any different?

I know, I know. I'm married. Obviously, you are thinking I fell in love with James.

But I didn't.

Don't get me wrong. I am deeply in love with my husband. I am so excited to share my life with him and experience the romance that God intended for us to have.

Think about it though. Let's look what Jesus has to teach us about falling. Matthew 7:24-27 says, “Therefore whoever hears these sayings of Mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on the rock; and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock. But everyone who hears these sayings of Mine, and does not do them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it fell. And great was its fall.”

I remember the first time I ever heard this parable that Jesus taught of the wise man who built his house upon a rock and the foolish man who built his house on the sand. In all of my six-year-old wisdom, I came home from church and told my mom that we studied The Three Little Pigs in Sunday School...but the preacher must have gone too long in big church because my teacher had to leave out one of the pigs. Cute, right? :)

Imagine the foolish man's house. I can just picture this dingy surfer dude getting the bright idea that He could construct his crib on the sand - loose fine pieces of rock that are unstable, change with the tide, and can be blown away with a light breeze. Bright idea, dude. Not your gnarliest plan.

But don't we do the same thing if we FALL in love? Is that relationship built on things that are unstable, like how AMAZING their blue eyes (or tinted contacts) are? Or things that can change, like emotion? (You know you've heard the excuse, "The magic's just not there anymore.") If a relationship is not build on a firm foundation, commitment can be shifted as easily as sand.

Enter Prince Charming. He's got it all together - he's prepared, complete with a plan AND a purpose. It is not an uption for his house (aka, the relationship in our case) to fall. He's a builder.

Think for a minute about the thoughts you associate with building...

1) To join parts to create something better (i.e. turning buttons and material into a new jacket!)

2) To establish or strengthen (like building a business)

3) To base or found (such as building a relationship on trust)

4) To increase in intensity (Like how Kelly Clarkson songs always builds on the bridge leading into the last chorus)

5) To praise or compliment (For instance, when your best friend builds you up to give you the courage to go talk to that really hot guy in your English class)

What that means for the wise man is that he is buiding something that is stronger and better than before. In a storm with heavy floods and harsh winds, his house remains secure. Sounds like Prince Charming has the potential to be Mr. Right, while our gnarly surfer dude has missed his chance of even being Mr. Right NOW.